So, you need to focus on getting insights from all three angles in order to develop. You need to be paying your knowledge forward – you need to teach someone else. You need to have those people who are evenly matched with you – “the other competent people around you”. You need to have a mentor who is better than you or as Holiday put it “a master you’re studying under”. Shamrock proposes that you need to surround yourself with three different kinds of people: He talked about a concept by the mixed martial arts pioneer, Frank Shamrock. Related to continuously challenging yourself, Holiday continued by providing insights into how to continuously develop yourself. I’m always pushing myself and that prevents me from getting conceded.” How to Continuously Develop Yourself? “I like to remain a student of what I do so that I never really feel like I’ve got it. “If you’re doing the same thing, the same way over and over again, ego creeps in because you think you’ve mastered it.” To continuously throw yourself into challenges keeps the ego in check. Lastly, Holiday advised that in general, you can fight ego by challenging yourself. Holiday explained that often very egotistical people surround themselves with yes men or yes women, which only feeds into their ego and prevents them from improving themselves. To keep yourself humble, you should surround yourself with people who challenge you and tell you the truth. “I try to look at myself as objectively as possible.”Īnother way that can help you combat ego is feedback, because “ego is really threatened by feedback”. There, he reflects on questions like what is he doing and why, what does he like about what he is doing, where he needs to improve, etc. Holiday does this by daily writing in his journal. Secondly, Holiday proposed that you need to take some time to reflect and review. Am I growing, am I getting better, am I realizing my potential, rather than focusing on these external metrics, which can make you really vulnerable.” “As far as my ambition goes, I tend to focus on this inner scorecard. The inner scorecard is about are we playing well and fulfilling our potential, whereas the external scorecard is about what is the score of the game. Holiday referred to a concept of an inner and outer scorecard that Bill Belichick and Nick Saban, successful American football coaches, have used. How to Avoid Your Ego Getting on the Way of Success? “What ego does is it prevents you from being as successful as you could be.” Thus, you need to focus on confidence and humility. Ego gets in the way of success, so instead, you want to have confidence. Holiday emphasized that he believes ego can’t be for the good. Instead, you should aim to be (as the stoics say) “on an even keel along the way”. If everyone is praising you, ego feels good.” Holiday proposed that you shouldn’t want to go through your life along with the opinions of others. “If everyone is criticizing you, ego feels bad. That is exactly why ego is vulnerable – it’s controlled by other people. It needs to hear from the outside world that you’re good enough, that you’re important, that you’re better than other people.” “Ego needs to be validated by other people. Holiday then went on to elaborate on his idea that “ego is the enemy”. So, he suggested: “You need to have that clear definition of success for yourself, or you end up making decisions that can make you less successful”. “Are you doing great work that you are proud of?”, that should be the key according to Holiday. But, he highlighted that in general, it is more important to be ambitious about maximizing your own potential. For example, a company needs to meet some external metrics in order to be successful. Holiday said that naturally to some extent in life we need external validation for our success. He highlighted that success cannot be based on recognition from others, about making money, or winning a contest, because those things are not fully under your control. “My definition of success is autonomy how much control do I have over my life day to day.” However, he has come to understand that this is not true. He admitted that when was younger he thought success is about external factors like money and influence. Holiday kicked off with the notion of success. You can sign up for upcoming webinars here. Here we give you a brief overview of Holiday’s thoughts and if you missed the webinar you can also watch the recording. Holiday shared many valuable pieces of advice on how to approach challenges with the right mindset, how to continuously develop, and how to recover from failures to aspiration and success. On 16 February, we sat down with Ryan Holiday, a world-renowned bestselling author, to talk about self-leadership.
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